Autism Acceptance/Awareness Starts with Me

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The other day I looked at my To Do list and thought to myself, “look at my world’s blending so nicely.” A little sewing, a little fashion, a little autism, a little working on my shop. I like this list.

In the past, I felt like I used to compartmentalize my life. Especially with this blog where, for a while, I decided that I would only talk about my sewing/fashion endeavors. Now, not so much. I enjoy giving people a glimpse into my life as a mother of a special needs kids who also runs a blog, an online shop, who likes fashion, etc. Sometimes my worlds collide and sometimes they blend nicely. This is Autism Acceptance and Awareness. As I accept my life and what it has become (the good and the bad), I can make others aware.

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*Vintage post from April 2013

Tips on Navigating a Museum/Gallery Space with a Special Needs Child

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As a museum educator with a special needs child (SNC), it is no surprise that I am interested in museum access. During winter break I usually take my boys to at least one museum; a children’s museum or an art museum with programs for special needs children. This week, however, I veered off script.

For weeks I have been wanting to catch an art show at a nearby gallery. Although this art space was not ideal for my youngest son who is on the autism spectrum, I felt that my older son would benefit from this display as it was in line with what he was learning in school. But again, this was a regular gallery, a college art gallery, a gallery that has no provisions for a special needs child so do I dare take my sensory needy, touchy feely, restless child to this kind of gallery?

I bit the bullet and did it. But not without some planning. Here are my tips on how to to enjoy a “typical museum gallery” with a special needs child like mine:

1. Keep it local

It just so happened that the exhibit I wanted to view was in my borough, this worked out great for us. If you want to spend the day looking at art with your SNC, check out local galleries and museums. The commute is shorter, and should things go south, at least you will be close to home.

2. Call ahead of time

I was already aware of this particular gallery’s space and knew it would be a good choice for us. Calling ahead and inquiring about the gallery/museum’s physical layout and what they have to offer, cuts anxiety and helps you be prepared.

3. Choose a small gallery or museum

A smaller space might provide a sense of calm for your child and help you navigate the area better with him/her. It also gives you a sense of completion. This helped us this week during our visit. I got to see every single art work which made me feel quite accomplished.

4. Early is best

Arriving at your destination earlier in the day also provides a sense of calm as there will be less people, less distractions, and less sensory overload.

5. Put something in your child’s hands

My son loves to touch EVERYTHING and EVERYONE. That’s who he is. So if I take him to a place where there are objects begging to be touched, I better offer something that is as equally enticing. My son loves strings so I usually give him a string when we go out to keep his hands busy and keep him from biting himself, which is another issue. But you might also consider something textured, one of his own paintings, a sensory toy, anything that will keep his hands off the art work.

6. Plan to eat afterwards

If you managed to pull this off, it’s time to celebrate! I knew there was a pizza place located right across the street from the gallery so the plan was to eat there afterwards. Unfortunately I didn’t follow rule number three and by the time we left the gallery, it was well into lunch time and no seats available in the restaurant. If I would have followed my own advice, and left a little earlier, this would have worked, and been the icing on the cake. Instead, we ate at a place closer to home which turned out okay, thank God!

I hope some of these tips can help you enjoy art with your SNC even if the museum/gallery is not as accessible as you would hope. In less than ideal situations it’s always about finding a solution and enjoying time together with the ones you love.

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*Vintage post from 2016

On Having Nice Things When you Have a Special Needs Child

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I love it! Looks like Kandinsky’s color studies – sorry for the dark photo

The other day, after having a blank wall for months, Jon came home with this beautiful work of art and said “we will try again.”

The last couple of paintings displayed in our living room were destroyed by Dan. He either broke the frames or peeled paper or paint (depending on the work’s medium) off of them. As a person who works in a museum, I felt physical pain when I saw this happen and resigned to not having any art work in the house. “I work in a museum, I can see art there”, I told myself.

The other day, a friend told me, “you must be someone who loves beautiful things.” Well, I do, but I know it’s difficult to keep them in tact in the house with Dan running and jumping everywhere. My house is pretty plain. I have no grand displays of art, picture frames, or beautiful objects.

When hubby brought this work to the house, it was like he was bringing a new baby home and I was hoping and praying my older child did not hurt it. Art IS my baby! Don’t hurt my baby! Dan needs to be taught.

I love my husband because he refuses to give up on us having a house filled with the things we love. For me it’s paintings and for him, fish tanks. He constantly asserts that we will not play down to his autism. “Autism shmautism”, he says, “he has to learn.” I have to learn too. With Dan, repetition is key, and I tend to give up too fast.

I’m grateful for his persistence. If art is my baby, I need it close to me. I don’t want to settle for visitation rights.

Now hubby wants us to get a dog…hold up man! One beautiful thing at a time.

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*This is a vintage post from 2016